Charged For Every Single Bite

When I was five years old, my family was told that I had eaten eighty-six thousand dollars’ worth of food in a single month.

My parents, horrified by what looked like an innate streak of grotesque, unchecked indulgence in a kindergartener, feared for my future. Convinced that my soul was rotting with greed, they decided the only cure was shock therapy: packing me off to "The Humble Road", a live-streamed reality show that dropped sheltered children of the ultra-wealthy into impoverished rural farmsteads to learn the virtue of honest sweat.