Chapter 2

2: 2

"Your dad and I are taking Cynthia to pick up her car, and we still need to buy her things for college."

Mom stood up.

"You—"

She paused, as if only now remembering I existed.

"You make your brother a meal."

"He's got driving lessons this afternoon. Take some water and food over to the driving school."

"Learning to drive is exhausting. You make sure your brother gets proper nutrition."

Christopher Henson, who'd been playing games this whole time, gave me a nod.

That was supposed to be a greeting.

"But I... I have to go back to school this afternoon to submit my college applications."

There was an edge of urgency in my voice.

"Those garbage scores of yours, what applications are you even submitting?"

Mom frowned in distaste.

"You're community-college material either way. I told you to go to the same school as Cynthia. Are your ears broken?"

Dad looked at me too, like I was hopeless.

"Alexandra, can't you be more sensible? Stop causing trouble for this family."

"You're the only useless one in this house. If you don't take care of your brother, who will?"

I lowered my head in silence, knowing there was no getting out of it today.

Just like the day of my second mock exam.

Mom had marched straight into the testing hall and dragged me out by the arm.

"Your sister has a singing competition today, and she doesn't even have a cheering section. How's that going to look?"

"You get over there right now and be her crowd."

The next day, my homeroom teacher called my parents in because I'd walked out of the exam.

But Mom just shot me a look of disgust.

"You bombed the test yourself. Now you want to drag me down and humiliate me along with you?"

"You can't even take an exam seriously. You'll never amount to anything when you grow up, and I'm not cleaning up your messes."

Then she took my sister off on a trip out of state.

And because my parents wouldn't cooperate, I was punished with a public apology in front of the whole school.

The bastard nobody wanted, that's what the other students called me.

I spent the whole afternoon at the driving school.

Under a sun pushing a hundred and five degrees, I ran to buy my brother water, cigarettes, and food.

Just when I was so worn out I could barely stay on my feet—

My brother held out a soda. "You've worked hard today. Take a break."

I looked at the soda, reached halfway, then pulled my hand back.

His eyes darkened.

"You're still holding on to what happened back then?"

I stayed quiet and didn't answer.

Freshman year of high school, my blood sugar crashed and I fainted at home.

My brother scrambled to scoop out a piece of cake and pushed it into my mouth, and that was what brought me around.

But my sister threw a fit the moment she got home.

"Why did my sister steal a bite of my birthday cake?"

"I'm not touching your leftover garbage. I don't want a birthday anymore."

Mom wouldn't hear a word of it. She pinned me down in the yard and made me kneel all night.

Dad was so angry he slapped me across the face several times.

The pouring rain soaked me until I was shaking, until a fever came on.

I held out until my brother finally came home.

Crying, I begged him to speak up for me.

"Christopher, I didn't steal the cake."

He looked at me, soaked through, then looked at our fuming sister.

And said in a low voice,

"You'd even steal your sister's cake? How can you have so little decency?"

"You deserve the punishment."

That was the first time I ever felt my heart go dead.

"Thanks, but I'm really not thirsty."

I worked to keep my smile easy.

Christopher gave me a complicated look and had just opened his mouth when Mom's call came through.

"Alexandra, get to the restaurant right now. We're throwing you a graduation party."

"So no one gets the wrong idea and thinks we play favorites as parents."

Her tone was stiff, but the words hit me like a bolt of lightning through my whole body.

Mom and Dad were throwing me a graduation party!

Tears welled up in my eyes all at once.

That hope buried deep inside me, long since gone cold, suddenly flickered with a bit of light.

Maybe I... maybe I could be seen too.

My brother watched me laughing and crying at once, and something complicated crossed his face.

Several times he seemed about to speak.

In the end he just said softly,

"Let me drive you over."

I heard the restaurant had been booked out by a big client, so my table had been shoved out into the hallway.

It was shabby, but I didn't mind.

It wasn't like I had any friends coming anyway.

The dishes on the table were small servings, more like half portions.

If anything, I was glad.

I don't eat much. Nothing would go to waste.

On a sheet of printer paper I wrote out the words: Alexandra's Graduation Party.

And I waited for the whole family to arrive so we could eat.

But my brother took a phone call and got up without hesitation to leave.

"Are Mom and Dad and Cynthia here?"

I asked, a little nervous.

"I'll come with you to meet them—"

Before I could finish, my brother waved me off.

"I've been to your graduation party. Now I'm going to Cynthia's."

And with that, he pushed open the banquet hall doors.

One glance was all it took to freeze me in place.

Inside it was packed and roaring with noise, nearly half the grade there.

Up on the stage, my sister stood in a custom-made gown, greeting the crowd.

Mom and Dad stood beside her, smiling.

A waiter passing by looked on with envy and sighed.

"What a grand affair!"

"They booked out the entire restaurant just to celebrate her getting into college."

"Being their daughter must be such a blessing. That's what real backing looks like."

In that moment, the sheet of paper in my hand slipped silently to the floor.