Chapter 1

At my sister Poppy’s sixteenth birthday party, she burst into tears because I showed up in a short skirt that exposed my legs.

Dad’s face darkened instantly.

“You upset Poppy. Minus one hundred points.”

Mom looked at me with undisguised disgust.

“You knew Poppy had just scraped her leg, and you still deliberately wore a short skirt in front of her. How shameless can you be?”

“Go to the restroom and change right now. Otherwise, that’s another three hundred points off.”

I didn’t move.

Poppy was a highly sensitive child, which meant her emotions fluctuated more easily than other kids’. Because of that, our family kept a special emotional scorebook just for her.

Make Poppy happy: plus five points.

Make Poppy angry: minus one hundred.

Do something for Poppy: plus ten.

Refuse Poppy’s request: minus two hundred.

Mom said however many points I had was how many dollars they’d give me for college tuition when school started.

So I’d spent the entire summer bending over backward to please Poppy. By the time school was about to start, I’d finally saved up five thousand points.

Then I poured her a glass of milk.

She said it was too cold.

Minus one hundred.

I held a sun umbrella over her when we went out.

She cried because I was blocking her view.

Minus five hundred.

And today, my score had finally dropped below zero.

When I still didn’t move, Mom gave me a shove.

“What are you standing there for? You’re at negative seventy now. Spend a few hundred dollars of your own money and buy your sister a birthday present to make it up to her. Then we’ll call it even and let you start over from zero.”

I said nothing.

I simply pulled on long sleeves and pants.

What they didn’t know was that I’d already changed my college choice from the school near our home to one almost eight hundred miles away.

I was done playing their point game.

...

I hadn’t brought a change of clothes to the banquet hall.

The long sleeves and pants I wore were actually part of a winter uniform I’d borrowed from a hotel employee.

They didn’t fit.

I looked ridiculous.

Some of the relatives around us couldn’t stand watching anymore.

“Nora’s still a kid. Poppy only scraped her leg. It’ll heal in a few days.”

“Girls like looking pretty. Nora wore the wrong skirt. It’s not that big a deal.”

“It’s so hot outside. What if she gets sick wearing that thick vest?”

Poppy immediately burst into tears.

“Uncle Grant, are you saying I’m being dramatic?”

She threw down whatever she was holding and ran toward the door.

“This is all my fault! I’ll leave right now!”

The entire room descended into chaos.

By the time they finally coaxed Poppy back inside, Dad was glaring at me with a terrifying expression.

“Nora, you were the one who screwed up and lost all your points.”

“Stop looking so wronged, like we’re the ones who owe you something.”

Mom stared at me with the same disgust.

“Poppy wants that new limited-edition doll. It’s two hundred dollars. Give her the money and apologize properly.”

“Otherwise, you lose another hundred points.”

The relatives exchanged glances.

No one dared say another word.

I wanted to tell them that Poppy had shoved that skirt into my hands before we left the house.

I wanted to explain that she’d threatened to get mad and have Mom deduct my points if I refused to wear it.

So I wore it.

Then she sobbed at her own birthday party because I did.

All the explanations rose to my lips.

I swallowed them back down.

Just like every other time.

Whenever Poppy cried, everyone expected me to give in.

The thick fleece lining of the vest trapped the heat against my body, and sweat poured down my skin.

My head spun.

A sharp pain stabbed through my chest.

When I was seven, Mom came home from a business trip with two identical gifts for Poppy and me.

Poppy threw a screaming fit because she didn’t want Mom buying anything for me.

After that, whenever our parents brought something home, there was only something for Poppy.

Never for me.

When I was thirteen, Poppy ran away on my birthday and left a note saying she couldn’t stand everyone paying attention to me because it made her feel ignored.

Everyone abandoned me to go look for her.

I waited at home all night.

By the time my ice cream cake had melted into a sticky puddle of cream, Mom and Dad finally came home with Poppy, carrying bags of things after taking her out for seafood.

I never celebrated another birthday after that.

Later, Poppy was diagnosed as a highly sensitive child.

That was when the emotional scorebook became part of our family.

A negative score meant punishment.

When I was little, Mom hit my palms with a wooden spoon.

When I got older, they tied the score to my allowance.

If Poppy was unhappy, I wouldn’t get a single dollar for an entire month.

At school, I survived on tap water and the cheapest white bread I could find.

I pulled the two hundred dollars I’d saved from my part-time job out of my pocket and walked over to Poppy.

Then I apologized.

“I’m sorry, Poppy. It was my fault. I shouldn’t have worn a skirt today.”

“Happy birthday. Here’s two hundred dollars for your present. I hope you can forgive me.”

Poppy grabbed the money.

Finally, she smiled.

“Thanks, Nora!”

Dad’s expression softened.

“That’s more like it. Nora, you’re the older sister. Stop picking fights with Poppy all the time.”

The relatives seemed relieved too.

“Nora’s always been such an easy kid.”

Then they stopped paying attention to me.

Everyone hurried to make Poppy happy.

Poppy wore her birthday hat while Dad cut her cake and Mom held the drink she hadn’t finished.

The relatives crowded around her, clapping and singing “Happy Birthday.”

I stood alone in the corner of the banquet hall.

Like a complete outsider.

When the party ended, I returned the uniform.

My entire face was flushed an unnatural red from the heat.

Mom came over and pressed a small piece of chocolate into my hand.

“Poppy’s just sensitive. She isn’t deliberately targeting you.”

“There are still a few days left in summer break. Be nicer to her and earn some points back. We’re not going to give you nothing.”

I didn’t look up.

“Okay.”

I didn’t want money I had to earn with points anymore.

Seven days from now, my mentor from the summer research program would personally meet me at the train station.

I was leaving this family.

And I was never coming back.