Chapter 4

My family walked into a beautiful house I had never seen before.

Behind the floor-to-ceiling glass sat a girl about my age.

She wore silk pajamas, and she settled without a care at a Steinway and played a few bars.

My parents' eyes were full of tenderness, and Nelson wore a look of approval I had never seen on him before.

I used to wonder why, when we were all just poor kids.

Nelson always carried a certain superiority over me. Once, without thinking, he brought it up: "You can't even play the piano?"

I had stared at him then, stunned, because our family couldn't even afford a keyboard.

Now I understood all of it.

Because he really did have a sister who could play the piano.

Mom took a necklace out of a gift bag, and every emerald on it was bigger than any I'd seen in a TV drama.

Her eyes soft with love, she pinched the girl's cheek. "Happy birthday, little birthday girl."

Nelson pushed Mom aside and held out a designer bag to the girl like he was showing off a treasure. "Vivien Delgado, the bag you've always wanted. Your big brother spent over a million on add-on purchases alone just to get them to allocate it to me."

Vivien shrieked and threw her arms around Nelson. "You're the best brother in the whole world."

I looked at everything inside that room, my eyes slowly stinging, my chest so tight I couldn't breathe.

Over a million? That was a number I had always thought of as astronomical.

My stomach cancer treatment only needed twenty thousand dollars up front, and I hadn't even dared to tell my family.

I was afraid it would deal a more fatal blow to a home already so poor.

But it turned out all of it was fake.

I retched, and the cramping pain in my stomach reminded me I didn't have much time left.

Through the glass and the drifting white curtains, I saw my dad take a red velvet box out of his pocket.

He drew out a pair of cloisonné gold bracelets and handed them to Vivien. "People say a girl should have a pair of silver bracelets, but my treasure deserves the best. Here, a pair of gold ones for you."

Vivien shook his hand away in distaste. "Dad, you're so tacky. Who gives gold at a coming-of-age party? Gold is what, a hundred grand tops. There's no thought in it at all."

Vivien's words left Dad's face red, and he hurried to coax her into putting them on, calling her his good girl over and over.

I stood there staring at that gold bracelet like a thief spying on someone else's happiness.

On my bare wrists, there had once been a pair of silver bracelets.

My parents gave them to me on my own coming-of-age day, and I was so excited I didn't sleep all night.

My parents said, "Every girl should have a bracelet on her wrist. We can't afford jade, we can't afford gold, all we can do is buy you silver. Sorry to shortchange you."

I cried at the time, moved to tears.

But the next day, they told me my brother's legs had gotten worse and there was no money for medicine.

I hesitated only a second before I handed over the silver bracelet I'd worn for a single day.

Back then, there had been more than tenderness in my parents' eyes. There had been satisfaction.

My silver bracelet. My rabbit.

To them, it had only been a test of how much I loved my family.

My parents told Vivien to go change into her gown to get ready for tonight's dinner.

They walked out of the house into the garden, and I quickly slipped into the flower bed to hide.

"More than ten years of hardship weren't wasted on Josephine. The girl knows how to put family first now. That rabbit the other day, I heard her crying her heart out, and she still didn't make a scene."

When Dad finished, Mom didn't quite agree. "I always feel like that girl thinks too much. Let's keep testing her a while longer."

Nelson nodded too. "Josephine's always a bit small-minded. Let's wait until she graduates from college before we tell her."

"That's right. We'll just have to keep up the poor act for a few more years. But it's all worth it for the children."

In three short sentences, they extended my probation.

I pressed a hand to my aching stomach, drowning in bitterness and hatred. But Mom, Dad, I don't have time to wait for you.

"And that girl's a little too cold-blooded."

There was displeasure in Mom's voice. "A rabbit she raised herself for a whole year, and after one good cry it's like she forgot about it."

"Last time little Vivien saw someone gutting a fish and cried for ages when she got home. So kindhearted."

Listening to my mom, I almost couldn't hold back my sobs.

But my kindness was built on their tests.

They wanted me to be kind, and they wanted me to love my family.

Only after Vivien called them away did I dare to cry out loud.

Fine rain began to fall from the sky, and the water mixed with the tears washing down my face.

By the time the Delgado dinner began, it was already pouring.

Inside, glasses clinked, everyone bright and polished, a sharp contrast to me, soaked through outside.

My parents and Nelson led Vivien around, introducing her to one guest after another.

At the center of the party sat a cake fully half a person tall.

For my own coming-of-age, in that cramped little room, we bought a cheap dinner roll, stuck in a candle, and I made a wish.

I looked at that cake half a person tall, then at the dazzling spread of imported food.

I closed my eyes in despair. All the pain and hardship of these dozen years felt like a joke in this moment.

The rain came down harder, and I clutched the hem of my clothes, drenched and wretched.

I looked at that bright, polished Vivien, and the inferiority and hatred inside me grew wild like weeds.

Shaking, I pulled out my old push-button phone and first took a few photos.

Then I made a call, and my voice broke as I asked, "Colin, could you adopt me?"