Chapter 1

My marriage to Julian was something I had forced.

I thought that with enough time, love would grow and we’d eventually be happy.

That was until I saw him laughing with a gorgeous young girl by the shore.

He pulled her into his arms, holding her hand as they dove into the turquoise waves.

The warning signs had been there all along. I was just playing deaf and blind.

That afternoon, I sank thirty meters deep into the ocean, surrounded by vibrant corals and swirling schools of fish.

Suddenly, it all felt completely meaningless.

I had spent three years living a lie. I refused to waste another second.

That evening, I turned to Julian, who was lying in bed flipping through a book.

"Let’s go diving tomorrow."

He didn't even look up. His long fingers casually turned a page.

"I already have a client booked. You should find another instructor."

I knew he would say no, but hearing his flat rejection still made my heart skip a painful beat.

He knew better than anyone about my trauma. He knew I didn't trust any instructor but him.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and said nothing. I didn't remind him that tomorrow was our wedding anniversary.

I had always told myself that being an adult meant dealing with compromises. I had ignored every red flag, desperately trying to keep our hollow marriage from falling apart.

The next day, I went alone to the stretch of beach where Julian and I first met.

I walked along the tide line, careful not to let the foam touch my bare feet.

Suddenly, a familiar figure caught my eye. Julian was standing in plain clothes outside a beachside snack shack, clearly waiting for someone.

I was about to call his name when I remembered his cold, warning glare from months ago: *Don’t disturb me while I’m working.*

Just then, a young girl bounced out of the shop. Giggling, she pressed an ice cream bar against his cheek.

"Coach Julian, your treat!"

Julian laughed, pulling her slender body straight into his chest. His face held a sweet, tender warmth I hadn't seen in years.

Something deep inside my chest caved in. The worst part of seeing it with your own eyes is that you can no longer pretend. Even if you shut your eyes, the image burns into your retinas.

Hand in hand, they strolled down the boardwalk. Unable to help myself, I trailed quietly behind them.

From their laughter and inside jokes, I learned her name was Amber. And they had been seeing each other for six months.

Amber ran barefoot across the sand, the sea breeze catching the hem of her white sundress like a fairy floating above the earth.

Julian carried her white sandals in one hand, trailing behind her with an indulgent smile, calling out for her to slow down.

I stood frozen, an ache tearing through my ribs.

When we first started dating, he used to carry my shoes, too. I was clumsy and forgetful, and he would always walk a step behind me, picking up whatever I dropped.

Lately, even though I hadn't dropped anything in years, he still instinctively walked behind me whenever we went out. I used to tease him about having an old habit he couldn't break.

Now I remembered the way he would stare blankly at his empty hands.

That habit hadn't been about me for a very long time.

Julian swept Amber up into a bridal carry. That was when she spotted me. Her smile faltered, her expression turning awkward.

Noticing her pause, Julian started to turn around. But Amber quickly cupped his face with both hands and pulled him down into a deep kiss.