Chapter 1

Seven years into my relationship with Julian Croft, when the fire broke out, he put the only gas mask on the face of his sweetheart.

"Sophie has asthma. Hold your breath a little longer — rescue is almost here."

I watched the burning beam crash down from above, and looked at the countdown panel on my wrist ticking to zero. Then I pressed the button labeled Terminate Host Body.

Three days later, firefighters pulled a charred corpse from the rubble.

Julian broke through the police cordon like a man losing his mind — only to find the body with its hands pressed tightly over its heart, clutching the little paper ring he'd once folded on a whim.

And me? I was sitting on a private jet bound for Wall Street, swirling a glass of red wine.

Across from me sat his uncle — the one everyone said had died young. The unhinged, unpredictable one.

The fire inside the abandoned chemical plant spread faster than anyone had anticipated.

Acrid chemical fumes mixed with thick smoke, clawing their way into my lungs with every breath.

Julian held Sophie tightly against his chest, his other hand locked around the single gas mask he'd just wrestled away from the security station.

There was only one mask.

And the fire escape leading up to the rooftop had already been swallowed by flames.

A helicopter circled outside the plant, its rotors thundering — but the smoke was too dense. There was no way to land.

A piece of shrapnel from an exploded steel rod had torn straight through my left arm. Blood soaked through my white shirt, dripping from my fingertips onto the scorching concrete floor, evaporating the instant it landed.

"Julian. Help me."

I used the last clean breath left in my lungs to call his name.

He turned and looked at me. Something flickered in those dark eyes — a flash of conflict.

Then Sophie broke into a violent coughing fit, her whole body going limp in his arms.

"Julian… I can't breathe… it hurts so much…"

She clutched the front of his shirt with both hands, tears streaming down her face, her skin pale as paper.

The hand holding the gas mask tightened.

Julian didn't look at me again. He turned away and pressed the mask firmly over Sophie's face.

"It's okay. Don't be scared. Just breathe."

"But what about you and Audrey?"

Sophie's voice came out muffled through the mask, thick with tears.

Julian's hands didn't pause for even a second as he adjusted the straps.

"She's trained in diving. Her lung capacity is fine. She can hold on until the firefighters get in."

But he'd forgotten — my left arm was already destroyed.

The pain and blood loss made it hard just to stay standing, let alone hold my breath in a room full of toxic fumes.

The helicopter dropped a rope ladder.

The moment Julian lifted Sophie up and she began climbing, she turned and looked back at me.

Those eyes — the ones that had been filled with suffering just moments ago — were now sharp with triumph and mockery.

She mouthed the words at me:

You lose.

The smoke had completely swallowed my vision.

My lungs felt like they were being shredded by a hundred blades.

Julian turned back, searching through the wreckage for anything wet he could use to cover my mouth and nose.

"Audrey, hang on. The fire crew is almost through."

There was an edge to his voice — subtle, but unmistakable. Impatience.

"Sophie has asthma. She can't handle this. Just wait a little longer."

Right on cue, a flat mechanical voice sounded in my head.

[Host. Affection level for target has stalled at sixty percent. Mission deemed a failure.]

[System countdown initiated. Ten. Nine. Eight…]

The virtual panel on my wrist — visible only to me — flashed red, frantic and relentless.

Seven years together. Over two thousand five hundred days and nights.

All of it, not enough to outweigh Sophie saying she couldn't breathe.

I stared at the man still searching through the debris not far from me.

He never knew. I had claustrophobia too. I was afraid of pain too.

[Three. Two. One. Countdown complete.]

[Terminate Host Body and dissolve binding — confirm?]

My fingers trembled as I raised my hand and pressed confirm.

Above me, a load-bearing beam — burned red-hot — came crashing down.

Julian finally panicked. He lunged toward me through the sparks and flames.

"Audrey, move!"

The fire swallowed me whole.

Before I lost consciousness entirely, I pressed the little ring he'd once folded out of a candy wrapper hard against my chest, over my heart.

The heat warped the air around me.

The last thing I heard was Julian's voice — raw, breaking, screaming my name.