Chapter 1

My sister Kira and I had shared one body since birth, each controlling it for half the year.

Even so, my CEO boyfriend Aiden loved me more than life itself.

He built me a glass-domed garden where it was always spring so I could experience the seasons I slept through, tattooed my name over his heart, and promised, “You’re the only one I love.”

I believed him.

Yet our wedding was postponed eighteen times in six months. Before every wedding date, I was caught in an accident. Each time, I was badly injured but never killed.

After I woke from the eighteenth accident, my private doctor told me my soul had suffered too much damage. When Kira woke in three days, I would disappear for good.

I stumbled home in a daze and overheard my father talking to Aiden.

“Eighteen accidents are too many. What if you really hurt Roxy?”

“I calculated the risks in every accident,” Aiden said calmly. “None of them was supposed to kill her. How else was I supposed to keep postponing the wedding until Kira woke?”

Tears blurred my vision.

“As you wish.”

Three days later, Kira woke as usual, and I never woke again.

But after I died, Aiden went mad with regret.

Chapter 1

I heard my father sigh inside the study.

“If Kira is the one you want, then tell Roxy. You don’t have to keep doing this.”

Aiden shook his head.

“Kira is wonderful. She’s bright, full of life, and she nearly died saving me. But the Hartwell Group needs a steady, levelheaded woman at my side, and Roxy is perfect for that. Besides, they share one body. I won’t abandon either of them.”

“Those eighteen accidents were the only way to keep postponing the wedding until Kira woke. A wedding and my heart are all I can give her.”

His heart?

The words cut straight through me.

Everything I had endured over the past six months had been part of Aiden’s plan to give my sister a wedding.

The first time, the brakes on my car had failed. Another time, I had fallen from a yacht and nearly drowned. Aiden had known exactly where I would be before every accident. Afterward, he had always been the first to find me, carry me into the hospital, and sit beside my bed promising me another wedding.

My parents had probably known all along. They had helped him lie to me.

They all loved Kira more.

No wonder I always woke during the coldest months of fall and winter, even though I had told them I hated winter. Kira got the warmth of spring and summer instead.

No wonder I spent every fall and winter studying until dawn, entering competitions, completing internships, and earning every honor attached to our shared identity. The most important exams and deadlines usually fell during Kira’s half of the year, so my parents pushed me to secure scholarships and admission offers in advance, sparing her from taking the exams herself.

I did the work in winter. Kira reaped the rewards in spring.

My chest ached so badly I could barely breathe.

They had betrayed me long before I ever found out.

I wiped away my tears, steadied my breathing, and left the house without making a sound.

By the time I returned to the hospital, I was calm again.

Aiden arrived that afternoon carrying my favorite white roses.

He adjusted the pillows behind me, then read through every page of my chart and test results.

“The doctor says you’re still very weak. You won’t have the strength to make it through the wedding,” he said gently. “We’ll have to postpone the wedding.”

He brushed the loose hair from my face. His touch was as tender as ever.

I looked into the eyes I had once trusted more than my own and forced myself not to pull away.

“All right.”

Aiden’s hand paused against my cheek.

“You’re not going to argue?”

Once, I would have insisted on going through with the wedding no matter how weak I was. After eighteen postponements, I would never have given him another excuse.

Now I only gave him a faint smile.

“If you think postponing it is best, then we’ll postpone it.”

Relief crossed his face. He bent down and kissed my forehead.

“I knew you would understand. Once you recover, we’ll choose another date.”

He had no idea I had heard the truth. He had no idea there would never be a next time.

That evening, an assistant brought me dinner.

I took one bite without thinking. Within seconds, my throat swelled shut and the spoon slipped from my fingers. I collapsed on the hospital bed, struggling to breathe, and the room erupted into chaos.

“She has a severe chestnut allergy. Get the epinephrine now!”

The assistant went pale.

“That’s impossible. Mr. Hartwell said Miss Blackwood loved chestnut cream.”

A tear slid from the corner of my eye.

Kira loved chestnuts. I was severely allergic to them.

We shared one body, but our souls were different, and the body reacted differently depending on which of us was in control.

During my half of the year, chestnuts had never appeared on our family’s table. Aiden used to inspect every dessert himself before placing it in front of me.

Now even he could no longer remember which preferences belonged to me.

Fine. As he wished.

In three days, I would fall asleep forever.

?

Chapter 2

?

When I finally regained consciousness the following morning, my bed was surrounded by people.

As I came to, I could feel that my soul had weakened further, its hold on this body more fragile than before.

My mother leaned over me and asked carefully, “Is it Kira?”

“It's me,” I said.

A flicker of disappointment crossed my parents' faces before they could hide it.

I tried to sit up, but my arms trembled and gave way. Aiden caught me before I fell back against the pillows.

Once Aiden was certain I was out of danger, his brow furrowed.

“You know you’re allergic to chestnuts. Why didn’t you check before you ate them?”

My mother stepped between us.

“She just woke up. Leave her alone.”

Then she took my hand, fear still clear in her eyes.

“How could you be so careless with yourself? Kira will be waking up soon—” She stopped abruptly and covered his mouth.

Once, I would have asked why Kira’s name was always the first one she called.

Now I merely squeezed her hand.

“I’m sorry, Mom.”

My parents stared me in shock. Neither of them had expected me to accept the blame so calmly, much less apologize.

Aiden kept his eyes on me.

I forced a tired smile.

“I did the wrong thing. I'm sorry.”

Aiden went still.

Taking advantage of the opportunity, my father spoke up.

“There’s one more thing. Kira plagiarized someone else’s Honors Thesis before graduation. The student is planning to report her to the university. I need you to convince her not to.”

Aiden took my hand, his voice gentle and coaxing.

“You and Kira share one body. To everyone else, whatever she did, you did. Do you really want to stand by and let her ruin your academic record?”

“Make this go away, and I’ll give you anything you want.”

“All right,” I said calmly.

Only then did the shock on my parents’ faces begin to fade, replaced by relief and approval.

Aiden squeezed my hand, satisfaction warming his eyes. To him, my ready agreement meant I had finally learned to be sensible.

I looked out the window and watched a dead leaf scrape across the glass.

“Kira is my sister, after all.”

He smiled and kissed the back of my hand.

“I knew you would understand.”

An hour later, Aiden and I stood outside the student’s house.

The moment I pushed the door open, a familiar voice tore into me.

“Roxy, you liar! You stole my thesis and cost me my degree. I’m reporting you to the university right now. I’ll make sure they revoke your diploma!”

A girl rushed out. It was Emily, my best friend at the university.

“Roxy, I really thought you wanted to be my friend. You ignored me every spring and summer, but as soon as the weather turned cold, you'd come find me and ask me to go to the library with you.”

“I assumed you had your reasons. Then, right before graduation, you came to me and asked to read my thesis.”

“I was an idiot. I actually trusted you.”

Tears streamed down her face as she glared at me with pure hatred.

“I wasn’t the one who plagiarized your thesis, Emily. Please trust me...” I shook my head over and over.

Of all the people Kira could have hurt, she had chosen Emily—the only real friend I had ever made at the university.

But Kira and I shared the same face and identity. To Emily, I was the person who had stolen her thesis.

Nothing I said could undo the harm she had suffered.

Emily raised her hand, fury burning in her eyes.

I stopped trying to explain.

Maybe someone like me—someone who shared her face, her name, and half her life with another soul—had never been meant to have a friend of her own. How could I, when Kira could wear my face each spring and destroy every relationship I built each winter?

I lowered my eyes.

“I’m sorry, Emily. I betrayed our friendship.”

Tears blurred my vision.

Emily’s raised hand trembled. She looked at the tears streaming down my face, but in the end, she could not bring herself to hit me.

“Roxy, I never thought you were this kind of person.”

She stepped back.

“Leave. From now on, we’re no longer friends.”

She went inside and closed the door in my face.

I stared at the closed door and finally understood that I had lost my only friend.

This time, the calm I had been pretending to feel finally shattered. A broken sob escaped my throat as Aiden pulled me hard against his chest.

“It’s over,” he murmured against my ear. “You still have me.”

His arms were as warm and strong as ever. For one treacherous moment, I wanted to believe everything that had happened that day was a nightmare.

But I knew it was all real.

In just two days, I had lost the man I loved and my best friend. All the while, I could feel my soul growing weaker.

I had only two days left.

Chapter 3

Aiden took me back to the hospital and booked the best private room available.

He gently stroked my cheek, his voice full of concern.

“I haven’t forgotten what you endured today. Kira went too far this time. You never should have had to face the consequences for her.”

“When you wake again, I’ll take you to the Maldives and give you another wedding. The northern lights, swimming with dolphins—wherever you want to go, I’ll take you.”

Before I heard the truth, his promises would have moved me. Now I only murmured a faint acknowledgment and turned my face away.

Aiden kept talking for a long time. When I gave him no response, he finally fell silent.

He was in no hurry. In his mind, we would marry sooner or later, and I would always be the wife he had chosen. He could take his time winning me over again.

He stayed beside my bed. When I felt dizzy, he helped me walk. He personally brought every meal, and the moment I frowned, he called for a doctor.

He helped me to the bathroom, cooked soup for me, and watched me take every dose of medicine. He refused to leave my care to anyone else.

Within a day, every nurse on the floor knew I had a handsome, wealthy fiancé who loved me more than life itself.

While adjusting my IV, one nurse smiled and said, “Mr. Hartwell must love you so much. He has a company to run and a wedding to plan, but he still can’t bear to leave your bedside for even a minute.”

I looked at Aiden asleep in the chair. One of his hands was still wrapped tightly around mine.

His tenderness was real.

That was what hurt the most.

He could plan eighteen accidents and sacrifice me again and again for Kira’s happiness, yet still sincerely believe that he loved me more than anyone else in the world.

The next morning, he arranged my discharge.

By then, even walking from the bed to the door left me short of breath. The weakness in my legs was getting harder to hide.

“Come to the office with me. Afterward, we’ll stop by the bridal boutique and look at custom gowns. They take months to make, so yours should be ready by the time you wake up again. Then we can finally have our wedding.”

Before I could answer, he opened a velvet box. Inside was a blue diamond necklace.

“You’ve been through so much these past few days, so I bought you a gift.”

He fastened the necklace around my neck and kissed the skin just behind my ear.

“Do you like it?”

“It’s beautiful.”

He smiled, satisfied.

When we reached Hartwell Group, he led me into the CEO’s office as naturally as if I had been there countless times before.

“Wait here. I have a meeting.”

The moment he left, I escaped into the restroom. His office was filled with traces of the life he lived every spring and summer, and I could barely breathe.

A female employee beside the sink noticed my necklace.

“Isn’t that the one Mr. Hartwell bought at auction in Sicily last June? It looked beautiful on you.”

My fingers froze against the clasp.

“Last June?”

She smiled. “Weren’t you there with him? Don’t you remember?”

I gave her an embarrassed smile, as though ashamed of having forgotten.

“I’ve been in and out of the hospital so much lately that my memory is a little hazy. Could you show me?”

She opened Aiden’s private Instagram account. It was filled with posts he had hidden from me.

She scrolled through them one after another.

One photo showed them kissing against the brilliant blue waters of Hawaii. In another, they traced a heart beneath the northern lights. A third showed their fingers intertwined on the deck of a yacht as sharks cut through the water below.

Every photograph had been taken in spring or summer.

Every destination was somewhere I had once begged Aiden to take me.

Whenever I asked, he said his company could not function without him, or that those places were not worth visiting in fall or winter.

The truth was simple. He had already been there with Kira.

The pain of realizing how completely he had deceived me tore through my soul, weakening it even further.

The employee panicked when she noticed my tears.

“Miss Blackwood, why are you crying? Everyone knows Mr. Hartwell only loves you. You’re the only woman allowed inside his office.”

I looked toward the restroom door.

Before today, I had never set foot in Aiden’s office.

Whenever I asked to visit, he told me he did not want to drag me into the company’s power struggles before we were married.

Kira, meanwhile, had been coming and going freely for years as the future Mrs. Hartwell.

“Thank you,” I said.

I handed the phone back and walked alone into the emergency stairwell.

I sat on the floor with both hands pressed over my mouth until every sob had subsided.

By the time the stairwell door flew open, I had already wiped away my tears before Aiden could see them.

“There you are.” Panic filled his voice. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

He crouched in front of me. “What happened?”

I lowered my head and gave him the answer he would find easiest to believe.

“I felt dizzy. I didn’t want to interrupt your meeting.”

His anger vanished at once.

“You should have called me.”

He bent down, lifted me into his arms, and carried me out of the stairwell.

I rested my head against his shoulder.

He never realized that I had seen the other life he shared with Kira.

?

Chapter 4

?

The bridal boutique was filled with pink roses. Every wedding dress prepared for me was pink as well.

My mother draped a shawl over my shoulders. She hesitated, then gestured toward the row of dresses.

"Custom gowns take months to make," she said carefully. "Why don’t you try them on today and see which one suits you best? Then everything will be ready for the wedding when you wake up again."

My father nodded as well. "That’s right. You’re only trying them on."

They said I was only choosing a design for the custom gown I would wear at my next wedding, yet every sample dress was in Kira’s favorite color.

I knew they had only brought me here to try on Kira’s wedding dress in her place.

“All right. I’ll try one.”

My mother’s smile became a little more natural, and the tension in my father’s expression eased.

Aiden looked pleased as well, as if my ready agreement proved I had finally learned to be sensible.

“Roxy,” he said, “if you hate pink, you don’t have to force yourself.”

I met his eyes and pretended his concern had moved me.

“It’s only a wedding dress. There’s no harm in trying it on.”

They relaxed. They had no idea I was not giving in. I was saying goodbye.

I tried on one dress after another while my parents discussed the cut, the neckline, and which shade of pink looked best.

By the third dress, my knees were trembling. Each layer of satin felt heavier than the last, but I kept smiling whenever they looked at me.

Aiden told me every dress looked beautiful.

When I put on the fifth one, he pulled me into his arms and kissed me.

The kiss was slow and tender, painfully familiar.

We had once loved each other so much.

Every fall and winter we had shared over the past three years had made me believe I had a life that truly belonged to me. He tucked my hands into his pockets to keep them warm, learned to cook my favorite soups, and remembered exactly how much sugar I took in my coffee.

Then he murmured against my lips, “Kira, you’re finally going to be my wife.”

The last fragile piece of my heart went numb.

I stepped out of his arms and let just the right amount of confusion show on my face.

“Did you just call me Kira?”

The color drained from Aiden’s face.

“No. I said Roxy.”

My parents exchanged a quick glance.

I paused deliberately, then smiled as though I had accepted his explanation.

“I’ve been exhausted these past few days. I must have misheard you.”

Aiden grabbed my hand and pressed it against the tattoo over his heart.

“This name belongs to you, and so do I.”

Once, the certainty in his voice would have made me believe anything.

Now all I could think about were the photographs he had hidden from me and the eighteen accidents he had arranged himself.

I lightly traced my name with one finger.

“I know.”

He loved me, but he loved Kira too.

I wondered whether he would regret any of this once I was gone for good.

One day remained.

As my soul continued to weaken, the pain grew steadily worse, and I barely slept that night.

?

Chapter 5

?

The next day, Aiden brought me to a ballroom that had been transformed into a sea of pink roses.

"The wedding planner wants to run through the entire ceremony in advance," he explained. "That way, everything will be ready when you wake up again."

By then, I had to lean against him to keep my balance.

Aiden held my hand as he led me through the rehearsal.

I stood where the wedding planner told me, smiled for the photographer, and raised no objections. I simply lowered my head and read from the cue card.

“For richer or poorer, I, Kira Blackwood, promise to... Kira?”

I stopped.

The wedding planner froze as well.

“Isn’t the bride Roxy Blackwood? Why does the cue card say Kira?”

An assistant rushed over and took the card from my hand.

“I’m so sorry. This must be an earlier version printed by mistake.”

I looked up at Aiden.

For one brief instant, naked panic crossed his face.

Ever since I overheard him talking to my father that day, I’d known he planned to give Kira a wedding. But even then, I never imagined he’d have the nerve to use me as Kira’s stand-in at her own wedding rehearsal.

I swallowed back the pain threatening to break me and tilted my head as though I understood nothing.

He quickly regained his composure and tightened his hand around mine.

“The wedding team mixed up your information. I’ll deal with it.”

I let him believe I trusted him.

“All right.”

My easy answer unsettled him more than anger would have.

“Roxy, when you wake up again, I’ll make up for all eighteen postponements. We’ll have the life you’ve always wanted.”

I smiled at him.

It was the first genuine smile I had given him in days.

Yet Aiden’s expression tightened for reasons even he could not explain.

Halfway through the rehearsal, the lighting rig overhead began to shake.

Someone screamed.

The rig broke loose and fell straight toward Aiden.

I did not think. I rushed forward and shoved him out of the way.

The lighting rig crashed to the floor less than three feet from us.

Aiden caught me around the waist and frantically checked my body.

“Are you hurt? Roxy, look at me.”

“I’m fine.”

My father rushed over and slapped me hard across the face.

“How could you be so careless with your body? Kira wakes tomorrow! Are you trying to make her suffer the consequences for you?”

The blow snapped my head to the side, leaving my ears ringing.

Aiden’s expression darkened at once. He steadied me and examined the mark on my face himself.

“Mr. Blackwood, you shouldn’t have hit her.”

“If you ever lay a hand on her again, the partnership between our families is over.”

His voice was ice-cold.

My traitorous heart still gave a small flutter.

My mother hurried over as well. After confirming I had no other injuries, she said, “You need to rest. The rehearsal is over.”

They took me to a suite upstairs and placed sleeping pills on the nightstand.

Pain had been tearing through my soul all day, each wave worse than the last. Ordinary painkillers no longer helped.

The specialist had told me sleep might spare me some of the suffering.

After my parents left the room, I stepped into the dark hallway to get a glass of water.

Their voices drifted from the sitting room around the corner.

Aiden lowered his voice.

“That slap was too hard. The mark may not fade by tomorrow. Kira will be upset when she wakes and sees it.”

So that was why he had stopped my father. He had not been protecting me at all. He was protecting the body Kira would wake up in tomorrow.

“That was my fault. I just lost my temper,” my father said. “But don’t you think Roxy’s reaction is a little strange? She’s never given in this easily before?”

Aiden hesitated for a moment.

“She’s probably only upset because the wrong name was read during the wedding rehearsal. When she wakes again, I’ll give her another wedding.”

“She loves me. I’ll win her over.”

There was not a trace of doubt in his voice.

I returned to the bedroom before they could find me.

They still mistook my silence for trust. They still believed there would be another fall, another winter, and endless chances to soothe my hurt with gifts and promises.

Even drawing breath took effort. My soul was already disappearing, and I could no longer endure the pain.

I did not know how much time had passed.

Aiden entered in his wedding suit, as handsome and gentle as ever.

Just as he had before, he sat beside me and pressed a tender kiss to my forehead.

“Roxy, when you wake up, I’ll give you another wedding.”

“You can choose the dress and the ring—whatever you like.”

A tear slipped silently from the corner of my eye.

No.

I would never wake up again.