Chapter 4

4: 4

4

The sushi place was genuinely nice.

Elegant setting, delicate food.

Hazel had ordered a whole table of dishes, fussing over me, setting food on my plate, refilling my water, playing the part of a flawless girlfriend.

If the man across from her had been the me of two weeks ago, I'd probably have melted into a grin by now.

But I sat there chewing the salmon sashimi, and it might as well have been wax.

Halfway through the meal, Hazel's phone rang.

She glanced at the screen, and something shifted in her face before she hit decline.

"Who was that?"

"No one. Telemarketer."

The words were barely out before it rang again.

She declined it. It rang again.

On the third try, I finally caught the name on the screen: "Chester."

There'd been a time when this used to eat at me.

His own brother was right here, yet whenever something came up, he never once turned to me for help.

It was always Hazel.

Now I couldn't even be bothered to be angry about it. I just said, evenly,

"Answer it. Maybe it's something real."

Hazel hesitated, then picked up.

Chester's voice on the other end was bright and urgent.

"Hazel, where are you? My car broke down, I'm stuck here at the mall, can you come get me?"

"Which mall?"

Her tone went taut at once. "Don't worry, I'm on my way."

She hung up and looked at me, caught in the middle.

"Zane, it's dark out now, Chester's car broke down, it's not safe for a guy alone out there..."

"Go." I lifted my teacup and took a sip. "I'll just grab a cab home."

"Are you sure you'll be okay on your own? Or you could wait for me here a bit, I'll come back for you as soon as I've got Chester..."

"No need."

I cut her off. "He's standing at the mall by himself. Don't keep him waiting."

Hazel studied me for a couple of seconds, as if measuring whether I was really not upset.

I smiled at her, and her face eased at once.

"Zane, I always knew you were the sensible one. I knew you'd understand."

"I'll come back for you the second I'm done."

She stood, grabbed her coat, threw out a hurried "text me when you get home," and left.

I sat alone in the empty private room.

In front of me was a whole table of food, barely touched.

When the waiter came to ask if I wanted it boxed up, I shook my head, paid the bill, and walked out of the restaurant alone.

It was the last farewell dinner anyway.

If Hazel wouldn't treasure it, why should I hold on to it.

The night wind was cold, a faint sting against my face.

I stood at the curb hailing a cab, and my phone buzzed again.

Chester had posted to social media.

In the photo he stood at the mall entrance, Hazel's car parked beside him.

Caption: "There's always someone who shows up right when you need them. So lucky."

Right then, the cab pulled up.

I switched off my phone and got in.

Back home, my mom was stewing chicken soup.

I weighed my words before I spoke.

"Mom, I'm being transferred for work tomorrow. I might not be back for a while."

Her hands went still over the pot.

"How long is a while?"

"Hard to say."

The soup bubbled away in the pot, steam filling the kitchen, and I couldn't make out her face.

I only heard her go quiet for a long moment before she said, "And Hazel? Is she going with you?"

"She's got her own job. She can't."

"Did the two of you..."

She picked her words carefully. "Did you have a fight?"

"No."

I kept my head down over the vegetables, snapping a green bean in two with my fingers.

"Mom, I just want to get out and see something else, change my surroundings. I'm twenty-six this year. I want to go make something of myself out there."

She didn't press. She knew me too well.

Ever since I was little I'd been the kind who kept everything bottled up.

Once I'd made up my mind, nothing anyone said would move me.

She only let out a long sigh. "Take good care of yourself, then."

My eyes went hot, and I turned away, pretending to watch the sparrows outside the window.

Early the next morning, over breakfast, Chester was chattering away, thrilled.

"Mom! Hazel says she's taking me to try out a new hot spring today. I won't be home for lunch!"

My mom said nothing. She looked up at me, her eyes complicated.

I smiled. "Good for you. While you're off work, you should get out and have fun."

She opened her mouth, then closed it, holding something back.

Soon Hazel drove up to get him.

Chester had changed into a white suit and climbed into the passenger seat.

The old me would have made an issue of it.

That passenger seat was mine, so why did Chester slide into it like he'd done it a hundred times.

But I didn't have the energy for any of that now.

The moment their car was out of sight, I picked up my suitcase and walked away without a backward glance.

It was only after Hazel had finished making the rounds of the amusement park with Chester that it suddenly hit her: I hadn't answered her messages in two days.

The last one was still the line she'd sent after leaving the sushi restaurant the night before.

"Zane, are you home yet?"

No reply.

And this morning, she'd messaged to ask, "You free after work tonight? Want to go see a movie together?"

Still nothing but silence.

A strange, nagging irritation coiled in her chest.

"I'll pick you up at your office after work."

"It's settled, then."

Still no reply.

After work Hazel went and waited downstairs from the office until dark, and I never came.

She went back to my place looking for me, and found I wasn't home either.

Only then did it register that something was wrong. Her face went slightly pale, and she ran upstairs and knocked on Chester's door.

"Chester, where's your brother?"