Chapter 2

I left the documents on the entry table and walked away.

After my parents died, I grew up in Grandfather's house. Most of my memories were of the estate—and of Lucian.

He was the one who helped me with my homework. Taught me how to carry myself. He tore up the love letters boys slipped into my bag and warned me not to fall for any of them.

When I got my first period, he was eighteen. His ears went red as he bought pads for me at the drugstore.

Watching the sunset catch on the flush of his face, I learned what it meant for a heart to race.

Later, that racing turned into something else.

And he drifted further and further away.

It was past midnight when I got home. The living room light was still on.

Grandfather was half-asleep on the couch.

He let out a long breath when he saw me.

"Another few minutes and I would have called the police."

I buried my face in his arms.

Tears spilled down my cheeks before I could stop them.

Grandfather had always loved me most.

In my last life, Lucian pushed him down the stairs because of me.

After Grandfather lost the use of his legs, Lucian dumped him in the cheapest nursing home he could find. Left him there to rot.

He sent me to a place just like it.

"I lost my phone," I said quietly. "I'll get a new one tomorrow."

It took a long while to coax him back to his room.

When I finally reached mine, everything looked unfamiliar—but safe.

So this was how easy it was to stop loving someone.

The next morning, I came downstairs to find Lucian and Serena sitting in the dining room.

Grandfather sat across from them, his face dark as a storm.

On the table was my favorite—seafood porridge.

Serena beamed at me. "Elara, did you sleep well last night?"

I noticed the red marks on her neck right away.

"Fine."

She didn't touch her food.

"Serena, why aren't you eating?" Lucian's voice was so gentle it almost made me drop my spoon.

She gave him a weak smile. "I'm allergic. It's okay—I'll grab something at the dining hall once we get to campus."

Lucian's expression darkened. He told Mrs. Clark to make her something else.

Grandfather slammed his chopsticks down. "Allergic? A farm girl?"

Lucian's jaw locked.

"Father, everything here is what Elara likes—"

"She's my granddaughter. She eats whatever the hell she wants."

Serena scrambled to smooth it over.

"Lucian, really, I can eat it. Don't upset your father over me."

The meal ended cold.

The moment Grandfather left the table, Lucian blocked my way.

"Keep your mouth shut. I don't want him knowing what happened last night. And—"

He tossed my phone at me.

"Try something like this again, and I'll make sure the whole family knows what you really are."

So he thought I was the one who'd drugged him.

No wonder he'd hated me so deeply in my last life. Throwing me into that club hadn't been enough.

He'd had his men feed me pills every day—asleep or awake, I was never lucid.

I'd stripped off my own clothes in front of strangers. Begged them. Lost every last shred of shame.

The pain ripped through my chest so hard I doubled over and crouched on the floor.

My head felt like it had been split open with a hammer.

"Lucian Ashford—whether you believe me or not, I had nothing to do with last night."

He just stared at me, eyes cold.

"You were the only one who came to my apartment yesterday. If not you, then who?"

"Unless you're going to tell me you don't have feelings for me?"

Being humiliated like that in front of Serena—my face went up in flames.

I lifted my chin.

"You're not that important to me anymore. Lucian Ashford—I feel sick for ever being attracted to you."

His face went rigid. "What did you say?"

I pointed at the door and told them both to get out.

"The person I cared about was the Lucian Ashford from years ago. Kind. Decent. Knew right from wrong."

I met his eyes.

"Not you."

I walked past him without looking back.