Chapter 1

When I was three, I was diagnosed with leukemia, and from that day on I became my twin sister's get-out-of-anything card.

The school held a sports day, and my sister used my medical records to skip signing up for a single event.

I was forced into two. I collapsed halfway through.

No one worried about me. They only looked at me with disgust.

"So useless! Can't even win a little glory for the class. Anyone watching would think all the kids in our family are made of glass."

At the fitness test, my parents used my medical records to file Loretta an exemption, so she walked away with a guaranteed passing score.

But I was too weak to do anything, so I got a zero, and that zero wrecked my SAT results too.

Even aching bones and a low fever only ever earned me one line.

"Quit acting sick. I refuse to believe a little thing like this could actually kill you!"

By the time freshman orientation training came around, Loretta once again used my medical records to get herself excused.

And I lost more than half my life out there under the sun.

They stayed cold. Not a flicker of softening.

That was when I finally understood. My body was never the thing ruining my life. They were.

…

"Sir, I really don't feel well."

This was the third time I'd raised my hand to say it.

The first time, the drill instructor spared me one careless glance and decided I was lying.

Then he lectured me.

"What is orientation training for? To toughen up your willpower!"

"If every one of you could just say you don't feel well and quit, then nobody would have to train at all."

Then he dropped his voice and said one more thing, close beside me.

"Anne Fox, don't hold this against me."

"Your mom and your sister both had a word with me. They said you needed a good, hard workout."

Only then did I realize this drill instructor was someone my mother knew.

They hadn't just forced me into orientation training. They'd taken away my right to rest too.

I watched him turn and walk off, done paying me any attention.

Something in me went cold and bleak, and all I could do was force myself to stay standing.

The second time, I was in too much pain to bear it, and I said it again.

He only said one thing. "If you don't want to do the training, you're free to leave. But once you leave, there's no coming back!"

I heard the threat in it, and my old habit of swallowing everything kicked in, so I shut my mouth again.

By the third time, I knew. If this kept up, my body would give out for good.

This time, before the drill instructor could even open his mouth,

the classmate beside me spoke up for me.

"Sir, let her rest a minute. Look, her skin's gone completely red!"

Once she said it, everyone else looked over at me, and sure enough, they saw how wrong I looked.

They all started putting in a good word for me.

"Yeah, sir, Anne looks pretty bad. Maybe let her sit down and rest first."

"If something actually happens, it'll be serious."

Only then did the drill instructor really look at me, and something moved in his face.

He was right on the verge of giving in when another voice cut in from the side.

"Don't let my sister fool you. She's loved faking sick since she was little."

"Sometimes even my parents and I can't tell whether she's really sick or just putting on a show."

I lifted my eyes, and even though my vision had already gone blurry,

I still made her out. My twin sister, Loretta Fox, coming over under a parasol.

"She's just jealous that I'm the sickly one who gets out of the training. But I don't want to be sickly either."

Then she looked at me.

Her voice turned long-suffering. "All right, little sister, I'll come train right alongside all of you. So stop pretending."

In just a few sentences, she buried what I'd said.

She even flipped how the whole class saw me.

I heard the murmuring start behind me.

"I heard Loretta has leukemia, always been in bad health. So sad."

"But somehow the one who looks sick to me is Anne."

"Didn't you hear her? Loved faking sick since she was little. She's just a good actress."

"And I actually spoke up for her a second ago. Unbelievable."

I tugged the corner of my mouth into something bitter.

That classmate wasn't wrong. The one who was actually sick was me.

And Loretta was the one putting on the act.

Too bad no one in this world ever believed me.

While I was thinking it, Loretta's voice came again, right beside me.

"Little sister, my advice is to tough it out. If Mom finds out, she'll be unhappy all over again."

"And whatever you do, don't fake fainting, or they'll be even angrier when they hear about it."

I knew her too well. Every time she coaxed me like this, it meant she was about to set me up.

Sure enough, the very next second, just as my body swayed and I was about to go down,

the sound of someone collapsing came from right beside me.