He Paid $1,000 for a $1,000,000 Banquet. So I Gave Him a Funeral

CH. 01

Chapter 1

4,151 words

My shop caters to all kinds of banquets, and today I landed a $1 million birthday gala contract. I was over the moon.

The second I posted it in the local business owners' group chat to brag, I expected everyone to be jealous. Instead, I got nothing but pity.

"Looks like it's finally your turn to deal with that deadbeat. You're about to take a huge hit on this one!"

The messages came pouring in, each one worse than the last. The messages made one thing clear: every one of them had been burned by him.

"That's the city's famous deadbeat assistant. Whenever he handles a job for his boss, he only puts down one-thousandth of the total as a deposit."

"Once the job's done, you never see the balance. At this point, it's pretty obvious he's pocketing the company's money.”

"And none of us dares ask him for the rest of the money. Ask about the balance and he hits you with the whole package—reports, complaints, and one-star reviews."

I'd just finished reading everyone's warnings and was about to cancel the order when my phone suddenly chimed with a notification that a $1,000 deposit had hit my account. It was from that assistant handling his boss's birthday gala, and it came with a threat.

"Take my deposit and don't even think about canceling on me, or I've got plenty of ways to make sure you can't do business in this city!"

I gave a short, humorless laugh and pulled up my price list. All right then. I'd forgotten to mention one little detail: my shop doesn't take deposits. Full payment only.

At my shop, $1,000 won't buy you a luxury birthday gala for a hundred tables and a thousand guests.It buys an outdoor funeral.

……

I stared at the messages still popping up in the local business owners' group chat, everyone urging me to cancel and keep the peace, then sent a reminder straight to Francis Delgado, the assistant who'd wired the $1,000 deposit.

"Assistant Francis, at my shop you get what you pay for. Full payment only, no deposits accepted. Whatever you pay for is what you get."

Francis didn't even bother replying. He ignored me completely.

Two minutes later, my shop's dashboard exploded with alerts.

"Ding! You've received a one-star review."

The chimes soon blended into a nonstop barrage.

I opened the review section. Every single review had come from a freshly registered burner account.

"Terrible service. Got sick after eating here and spent three days with diarrhea. Avoid this place."

"Steer clear of this place, the owner is rude and nasty, and I found a big black bug in my food!"

Hundreds of one-star reviews came pouring in, dragging my shop's rating from 4.9 all the way down to 1.2 in an instant.

I took a screenshot and sent it straight to Francis.

"Assistant Francis, is this your doing?"

He replied in a heartbeat.

"Ms. Armstrong, I believe you understand the rules now."

"That $1,000 deposit, is it enough for you to take the order and do the job?"

I stared at the words on my screen, so angry I had to laugh.

"Sure. It can be done."

You get what you pay for.

Pay $1,000 and expect me to host a luxury birthday gala for a hundred tables and a thousand guests?

Keep dreaming!

I switched back to the group chat.

"Everyone, I'm not going to cave."

"That $1,000 deposit from Assistant Francis only covers one thing on my price list: an outdoor funeral."

"Since he won't let me cancel, then I'll get a great big surprise ready for him."

The chat blew up instantly.

"Vanessa Armstrong, you've lost your mind."

"We're not in a position to fight someone like him. Paying to make the trouble go away is the smart move."

"Last time I took his order, I never saw a dime of the balance, and he sent people to stand outside my shop and curse me out for three days straight."

"I had it worse. He came to order flowers on the company's behalf, then insisted there were bugs inside that had bitten an employee. I asked for a hospital report and he wouldn't give me one, just flat-out extorted $5,000 from me."

"Take my advice, refund his deposit, throw in a little extra, and beg him to let you off the job."

I stared at the horror stories flooding the chat. Then I finally spoke up.