The $1.40 Breakup

The night before our supposed engagement, my boyfriend, Derek, sent me a file with a cryptic, romantic-sounding title: The Love Audit.

We had been together for three years. I clicked it open with a fluttering heart, expecting a digital scrapbook—a montage of our late-night drives, brunch dates, and whispered promises. Instead, my screen was flooded by a cold, clinical Excel spreadsheet.

It was a meticulous record of every cent spent since our first date. Every coffee, every subway fare, even a two-dollar bottle of water from six months ago.